Over and Over and Over

The motivation crash I reported at the end of February... well it has not swung back up.

And I am in a Harry Potter kick. Which is exactly what my New Years Resolutions were designed to prevent/remedy - you know, read new books and listen to new music instead of listening to the same stuff over and over, because how does the same thing over and over expand your knowledge or improve your life?

But sometimes the same thing over and over again is just what you want. I watched the first 4 harry potters in the last three days. I listened to movies 2&3 on CD about 4 times in the past 2 work day. I am about to go read the second book while watching the fifth movie, because that is what sounds good to me.

You all probably think I am insane. Or obsessed. Its catharsis, what can I tell you? Maybe if my motivation swings back the other direction I will get back to those resolutions...


(For the record, its not up to quota, but I have read 2 books from my recommended list and watched 1 classic movie in the last month. And I am 2/3 of the way through a second classic movie... so I am doing SOMETHING besides Harry Potter... just not as much as I could be).

Friday (ish)

Another week gone.
No big surprises this week at work. Uneventful. I will take it!!

It got really warm and summerlike here for about 7 days, and now its around freezing again. I am totally OK with that. The warmth was not horrible, but I just wasn't ready for it really to be coming.

I hosted book club last night and therefore my downstairs is very clean. Its nice. It took me 2.5 hrs to totally clean out - declutter, vacuum, dishes, etc. I also made buffalo chicken dip (also known as crack dip, because its addictive). Small turnout - only two people came! But it was still fun. The book was crazy depressing, about what could theoretically happen if someone set off an EMP over the U.S. It made me want to be in Duluth. Everything these days makes me want to be in Duluth. Come on job gods, give DH a job.

Thats it. Animals are all good. No big plans this weekend, just chillaxed. Motivation still low but not bottomed out like it was. Life is good.

Friday was worse than Thursday at work. Plus I had a migraine. It was not fun. I came home sick and spent the afternoon trying various methods of getting rid of it.

DH's motorcycle also got delivered on Friday, and he is enjoying it.

We went to see Les Miserables last night, and it was quite good. The set is amazing.

Today we ran up to Medina to see my Uncle and Aunt. It was a nice afternoon.

I am really glad I had the weekend to step back and mentally reset for work. Things have been so negative, I need to change my thinking. Tommorrow I will go to work, do my job, and come home. I will not get wrapped up in the drama of rule changes and budget problems. I will not succomb to the miserable mood. It is just a job, not life, not the end of the world.

Workplace Blues

More changes.

A sense of doom and "they are out to get us" is pervading my entire workplace and slowly my mind. Morale is so low and dropping everyday.

I need to start applying to Minnesota jobs.

News From Columbus

DH bought a motorcycle!! I have not seen it yet, should be delivered soon. He has wanted one for years. At first I said no because of safety. Then I started working for the bureau of disability and my view changed. For awhile I have said no because of money, but DH has come up with a bunch of ways to save money that don't affect me, that all add up to MORE than a motorcycle:
(1) He is not going to the Kentucky Derby this year.
(2) We are using his work rewards program to pay for my Starbucks habit
(3) I am driving the Chrylser to save on gas money
(4) He is no longer eating out at lunch.
(5) He is changing parking garages to a cheaper option
So, here comes the motorcycle!!!

Other news - I got really excited when I found out that "Deadliest Catch" is coming to Columbus in may! Its a speaking tour featuring 3 of the captains. I am SO excited. Like, jumping up and down excited. DH bought tickets this morning. It will be my B-day celebration, we can go out for seafood and then to see the captains talk!!

Other news - OT has been discontinued, effective immediately mid day friday. They literally sent people home in the middle of the day if they were in overtime status. We are thinking this has to do with how the budget negotiations are going in Washington, since its SSA that pays our OT and SSA that decided to stop giving it to us right now.

Other news - I went furniture shopping with a friend last Saturday. We hit 9 consignment and antique stores across Columbus, and found nothing. I was hoping to get book shelves, but no luck. But, it was a very fun day with my friend. I introduced him to El Vaquero. How do you live in Cbus for 5 years and not know what it is??

Other news - I have two books to read in the next 2 weeks, and I am 50 pgs into one with no motivation. *sigh*.

That is all.

Suppose I should ...

suppose I should post or something

I have been listening to some music. I admit it is starting to all blur together. I am NOT saying that these bands all sound the same, I am just saying that I don't really have the desire to differentiate between them except the really good and really bad. Most of them are just fine.

Here are some reviews I wrote last week before it all started to blur together:

David Bowie - When I hear this name I think "the Labrynth" (on crack 1980s muppet movie... not like kermit the frog muppets, perhaps we should say Jim Henson puppet movie rather than muppet). I enjoyed Bowie's music just fine, it was not quite what I expected based upon the movie, but who knows when the album I have is from. I believe he is still creating new work today.

Megadeath - remind me a lot of Metallica, unsuprisingly. It feels like they grew up listening to metallica and were like "YEAH!! LETS HAVE A HEAVY METAL BAND! What is a good, heavy metal name. I know!! MEGADEATH!!!". I mean, it sounds like Jack Black picked the name as a spoof in a funny movie. OK. I actually just read their wikipedia article - no surprise it sounds like Metallica - its not a rip off, its a spin off- as in one of metallica's members got pissed and left to form this band.

Motley Crew - lets be honest, I did not really listen listen to this band... I listened to it as in it was playing but did not give it much mental attention. It made good background music? I mean, I don't think its boring or anything, I was just having an off morning. I probably should listen to it again when I have more mental energy for it.

Dear NKOTB and Janet Jackson. I apologize for insulting your lyrics. Yes. They were bad. They were horrible. But it was not appropriate for me to describe them as the worst lyrics ever. That award goes to R. Kelly and I am sorry I implied you were worse than him. Dear R. Kelly. You are a walking stereotype of bad music that parent's complain about. If I wanted to hear about the six different ways you want to or actually are sleeping with a girl, I would call a bad sex hotline. Scratch that. I bet sex hotline workers are more creative than you. I felt like someone was going to to catch me listening to you at work and fire me for inappropriate music. Thanks for making me feel dirty, and not in that good way. I would also like to point out that I am not generally opposed to lyrics about sex. I mean, I love the Nine Inch Nails song "--" that is remixed to the Mario theme. The Discovery Channel song was one of my favorites in high school, and I love Ludicrous's "--". The difference between these and R. Kelly is that they are all fun and creative, not just matter of fact descriptions of being horny or various sex acts.


Other bands/artists I have recently listened to: Phish, Spoon, O.A.R., Sting, Ravel, Vaughn Williams, Ours, Yanni, R.E.M., The Raveonettes, Steely Dan, Paramore, Rush

Fake It...

I wrote out a decent lengthed post about my lack of motivation but relative productivity. The moral was "Fake it until you make it", or in this case, until you feel it.

I still don't feel it.

Thanks blogger for eating my post. I definitely don't have the motivation to re-write it.

More Work Changes

This morning my classical radio host's weather report was "rain all day, but you probably figured that out by now". It was not raining though, and it did not even look like rain. It didn't start raining here for about another 2 hrs, but it has not stopped since then. I keep managing to wear the wrong jacket. Yesterday it looked so sunny and nice out I wore my light jacket, only to have it be below freezing. Today I thought "it was cold yesterday, so I will wear my winter jacket", only to have it pour, when it sucks for rain. I guess I should read a weather report or something.

More changes at work, these unrelated to the new director. They have been in the works for sometime, involving the leave policy and discipline grids. They are making it more difficult to take leave on short notice and easier, or even required, for supervisors to deny leave if people's desks are not caught up. When I say desk with regards to work, it means the same thing as pending, which is the same thing as saying caseload. As in, I don't mean my physical desk is messy, I mean my electronic desk, or "to do" list has lots on it, or a lot of things that are urgent or overdue. So in other words, if you are not caught up on your work you can be denied leave, even if it was planned months in advance, even if you have plane tickets, even if it is your only daughter's wedding, etc etc etc. People are not happy. It kind of sucks. It also sounds like they may be cracking down on our ability to flex our schedules (change them from week to week to make way for things like appts, illness, whatever), though I won't know that until I get the training on 3/17. These changes are annoying, but its not the end of the world. I think the biggest issue going on at my work right now is that they are changing all of these policies at once, all in a way that is more stringent or less worker friendly. Essentially they are taking away many of the non-monetary "perks" of the job - casual dress, schedule flexability, leave flexability, and the general sense of contentment and happiness in the building. I mean, when I started there everyone talked about what a great place it was to work, how friendly everyone was, how flexible things were. That has all changed rapidly. Here is the "doom" possability - they currently are removing all non-monetary perks. With or without SB5 (the anti-union legislation being worked on by the state government here), it is extremely probable that there will either be significant cuts in pay, benefits, or the instution of a lot more "cost saving days" (forced unpaid leave). With the federal government budget issues, its possible overtime will be cut. If all of this combines, I forsee a lot of unhappy employees and a lot of people looking to get out of the organization - not a good thing when they are trying to increase the ammt of people doing this job because the caseload is so high. We shall see. I don't plan to leave despite any of these things, unless its to move to Minnesota.

We had classics bookclub last night. We read Alice in Wonderland and went to the Mellow Mushroom, which has giant mushrooms in it, so very fitting. It was annoying that two people cancelled on us when there is only 6 to begin with. 7 now I guess. We had a new girl last night and she fit in great, I hope she liked us and keeps coming.

I am watching Deadliest Catch again. Wouldn't be surprised if I end up watching the rest of season 2 this weekend, I have no other plans, not even a symphony. DH is on call and I just have not made social plans recently. I don't know what it is about this show, but I love it.

My sister closed on a house yesterday. I am super excited for her. I wish I was in Duluth to help her pick out paint colors and such. It is a major fixer-upper, so they won't be moving in for awhile until they can make some changes.

I am hungry, hope DH calls soon and brings home dinner.

The More You Know

Things I learned in the last few days:

"paczki's" are polish pastries (sort of jelly filled donuts) that are served on Fat Tuesday. Someone was surprised when I had not heard of them. Apparently Cleveland is SO POLISH that its weird not to know this. I suppose it is sort of like being from Duluth and knowing what Lutefisk and Lefsa are. But really, Polish Paczki's are very similar to the apricot "krapfen" I was fed in Austria.

"rap groups" exist. Apparently. I mean, when it turned out the answer to this "rap group" question was Beastie Boys it made sense, I am not sure what else you would call them (of course my knowledge is based on the one song of theirs I know from Rock Band)... but I always think of rap artists, not rap groups. I prefer rap artists I think.

I also meant to post about Oscar Fashion, there were some beautiful dresses, fewer totally ugly things that normal. Here is Mila Kunis, love the dress on her but I could never pull it off:

Then there is this beauty. I mean, I wish I could have looked this adorable when I was 14...

Don't get any ideas Benjamin, I am sure she is too tall for you.

And here we have my pick for worst dressed. One person described it as looking like she had spilled mustard on her shoulders and back, I have to agree. The colors are so hideous together, and this is coming from ME, queen of mismatched.

One last comment, this is Helena Bonman Carter, she is Tim Burton's wife and appears in most of his movies. I don't like this dress, but was surprised by how tame it is compared to her normal get-up. Perhaps actually being nominated calmed her down?

Here is an example of what I mean by crazy outfits:

The interesting thing to me is that the media hardly even comments on her get up. I think she has just made it so clea that she doesn't give a damn what the fashion experts or media say about her clothes that they don't even bother. She is cast off as an "eccentric" who shouldn't be expected to wear something anyone else will like.