Monday, May 21, 2012

Ball O'Stress

Between the daycare search, paperwork etc for the new job, and the house hunt, I am feeling extremely stressed. This is the most stressed I have been since, I don't know... I was pretty stressed about the decisions involving delivery of Benjamin back in December, but I think this is worse. Before that... well my last job was not stressful at all so I would say since General Exams in graduate school.. yeah those might have been more stressful than this.

I spent the morning calling and emailing day cares. All the work resulted in one visit this evening, which did not go well.We both found the owner to be overbearing and odd, and the set up to be less than favorable. I am worried we won't find better. The problem with daycare search that non-parents don't seem to understand is that you don't just go pick a daycare, you have to find one that has an opening, and then there may be several people trying to get that opening. It sucks. My mom and her work friends are trying to help with leads, and I have four weeks, but its all I can think about practically. Except I cannot afford to only be thinking about that...

I also set up to go view more houses. After a small escapade with a house we thought we loved but realized after we had an offer in that we didn't, we are really trying to gather ourselves and identify what our goals are. I think we have our heads on straight now about that, but we will see how the next round of viewings go. The pressure is on if we want to close in June. Finding the right place is practically all I think about. Except I cannot afford to only be thinking about that....

I got another round of paperwork for my new employment, and I have to arrange to go take a drug test. Clearly I don't expect their to be any glitches, but making sure it all gets done still occupies a great deal of my attention, its practically all I think about. Except I cannot afford to only be thinking about that....

My car needs repairs too by the way.

Luckily there is some shining light in this.  Benjamin was a sweet little adorable angel for me today. He was cheerful and babbling and laughing while he was awake and went down for his naps easily. He looks SO CLOSE to crawling, but I don't think he quite has the torso strength for it yet. He will push his entire chest and stomach up in the air, and today he even was wiggling his back end under him, but he can't hold that torso straight. He is also very close to sitting unassisted. He was talking so much today it was amazing. At one point he would burst out laughing every time I said a letter. ("A" (he breaks out laughing) "B" (he breaks out laughing) etc. For a whole alphabet and a half!). He is so adorable. I cannot believe how big he is getting.

On one last note, fiction. I have a lot of fiction in my life when there is time for it. Mainly books and TV. I have been watching MASH while I nurse for the past 2-3 weeks and I am on the final season. I am reading a book, Little Bee, for book club tomorrow. I have realized that feeling as stressed as I have been, these are not appropriate forms of fiction. Both the book and the final season of MASH are depressing and I just can't take it. I feel like it is adding to my stress instead of relieving it! But in the case of the book, I need to get it done in the next 20 hrs! And for MASH, I only have two discs left so I want to just finish, but I really should postpone and put something cheerful/comforting on.

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